Translated into English, the Language
of The United States:
My fellow Indonesians, I mean americans, I have been, me, myself
under attack for a long time now. I have been attacked more times
than Custer at the battle of Bull Run, I mean the battle of the Bulge,
err, I mean Hamburger Hill. Me not good with American History.
Life in the White House has been difficult for me and my wife and
my mother in law. I had to bring her along, you know, it's a nice
touch ----- I mean my mother in law.
I also had to bring along the groupies from Chicago, my fav city.
But they are such hangers on -- I had to give them jobs, so I made
them zzzars. Bunch of parasites, now I know how Al Capone felt.
With FOX news, Limbaugh, Beck, Savage, Hannity, Levine,
Krauthammer, billy spin zone O'Reilly and others too numerous
to mention attacking me, myself and I, I am finding it very hard
to concentrate on why I became president -- the food, the vacations
My me time has gone to pot. I mean, for me, pot has consumed my
me time. Can't even go to the Hamptons this year and snub the
Kennedys. My vacation schedule is shot to Hades, I have to work
on ruining the Constitution, breaking the law, hiding my records and
now hiding Holders records -- what the ...? Then I am expected to
campaign like a rock star and raise a billion dollars from people like
you that I have lied to, cheated, tricked, robbed blind -- I don't know
how much longer me and I can do this.
Just let me run my campaign, gets lots of money, grin for the cameras,
and act like a big shot. I really enjoy meeting these rubes who are
dumb enough to vote for me and my Marxist ideas. The greasy food
is good too, all I get at the White House is gourmet this and gourmet
that, I are sick of Kobe steak, altho I did have momma in law send
a half ton to our Chicago address.
Let me, I, myself, be perfectly clear why I want four more years of
playing the big shot. I cannot fathom going back to Chicago as a
Rahm Emanuel is in charge there. I am so much bigger than he is.
That slimy, crime filled, horrible town is not big enough for both
of us. Michelle can't stand him or his wife anyway. I need to be
I have never accomplished anything in my life, and probably never
will. I need this job for four more years just for my self esteem. Me,
my self esteem. I am important to me, if to no one else. I ain't got
nothin' but this job.
I like the perks. Camp David, I should get the name changed to
Camp Barry, maybe that idiot Axelrod can get that done. I can fly
anywhere, crowds flock to see me, it is like being a rock star -- I
can lie all day, like the Persian rugs in the Lincoln bed room and
no one in the media questions me. Why? Because I am Barry
Soetoro, I mean Harry Bounel, I mean Barak Hussein, I mean
barock Zerobama and I have a dozen Social Security numbers to
Who wants only one name, one country, one SS number?
So to sum up, I, me, myself am too important to lose this election
to someone who makes a hundred times the money I do, who has
worked all his life, who has a real identity, who only has one
Social Security number, has only one name and no scandals in
his past. I can't lose to a guy like that.
So, vote for me, vote for I, for me, send me your money, your
wedding gifts, birthday gifts, your anniversary gifts and any loose
change you ever hope to have in my vision of america.
You cheapskates can send three dollars, you idiot millionaires who
I will destroy in the next four years can send hundreds of thousands.
Give to me till it hurts, vote early and often, help me ruin everything
this country has ever stood for. I can destroy everything if I can just
get four more years. I am zerobama, and I approve of everything I
have ever done.